Take the Risk or Waste it

Audzubillahiminasyaitonirrojim, Bismillahirrohmanirrohim...

So, we went for house-viewing last two days. I have never imagined this day to happen, what’s more to consider buying a house in Bangi, but that’s where Qib grew up as an amazing person, I am honoured to let our kids to grow up in the same city as him.

Really, buying a house is all about the future. I will put mysef aside on all other things that really matter. Qib wants something near to his workplace, that also means it will take 1 hour drive + multiple tolls to mine, but its okay, as long as it is easy for him. I mean, I know by my heart, his job is more stressful, if there is a way to ease him, I will do whatever. Other than that, which school would our kids probably go someday? Well, I went to a small school in a small village (the people mindset there, urgh), an environment I will avoid my kids to experience. So yes, Bangi would be perfect for our family, insyaAllah.

Ah, about the house, it almost perfect too, a mature neighbourhood surrounded by nature, my kids would probably able to walk to school since it is just seperated by the roadside. The location is super strategic, in front of the house is greenery and it has a balcony facing a beautiful sky. Just that, the house is 26 years old, the wiring and piping are off the market (I mean if anything happen, no spare part to repair anymore) and it is just 9 ft tall on each floor, and too many to repair, we are out of budget, auch!

Long story short, we have to let go tho how perfect this was and this might be...

I just can’t get rid of this from my mind and I am pretty much sad or afraid to think about what we have to our lives eventually. I mean, I am grateful, but that doesn’t stop me from wanting more or wanting the best for my family. I really want to start something fresh with Qib, like moving to our own house and us being independent, how cool is that!

So to avoid being miserable any further, we went out that night. And I looked around just to understand that its not only me who is facing challenges in life, I mean, outside, there are thousands of stories worth sharing more than mine. So, I decided to be happy with what I can afford right now. As always, it has to come with an ice-cream. Cheap treat is the best treat. It was nestle crunch for the momory!

Later that night, while we were in our car headed back and there was a traffic light about to change orange in 3,2,1,.. Qib asked me this question:

Qib: You think we can make it? (Like should we slow down or speed up on this traffic light)

Me: If you are the type who will take the oppurtunity, then we will make it, if not, we don’t. Take the risk or waste it. (I was actually being sarcastic about our decision of letting go the house, he got the jokes and instantly replied)

Qib: You don’t want to take the risk, you moron! :D

Oh God, one day, we would look back to these moments, it was one of it where we took a huge decision in our lives, not to what we are about to start, but what we just ended. I will remember this day like what our parents once told us ‘awal-awal kahwin dulu memang bukan senang.’ How good it feels to experience it now on our own.

Hopefully one day, we will look back at this and said ‘our decision was right’ as we are wise enough to understand, we can’t afford to take the risk and nope, we dont waste it, we just secured our current financial on what actually matters.’

Someday, I pray that Allah will give us something that is good for us and our kids. Allah delays is not Allah rejections. Allah timing is perfect. Allah has planned something even better for us, trust Him. Let’s go through this together and see what we have to our lives next. Aamiin.

Xoxo, fee.

Alhamdulillah for everything~

P/s: We dont have any kids yet...